Why Social Media Shouldn't Make You Feel Like a Terrible Parent

Here’s Why You Shouldn’t Let Perfect Social Media Lives Make You Feel Like a Bad Parent

Do you find that social media is turning you into a more insecure parent? Do you look at other people’s posts and feel like they have everything figured out, while you struggle to keep your head above water? Do you see others traveling with their families and feel like a bad parent for not being able to give your children the same opportunities?

Perfect social media lives make everyone feel insecure, but when you’re a parent, that hits hard. You’re doing the best you can to raise your kids, and a simple scroll through social media can make you feel like you’re not doing well enough.

The key thing to remember is that social media lives rarely show the full picture. There are a lot of things behind them that you don’t see. Maybe if you could, they wouldn’t make you feel like such a bad parent.

Different Resources

Some families have access to better help than you. Maybe they can afford a live-in nanny, or they’re part of a much bigger family that doesn’t mind having a big role in helping to raise those children. But not every family is big enough to help out, nor does every family have enough money to hire live-in help or to go on holidays so often.

Not having a big family or enough money to travel isn’t a failure on your part. It doesn’t make you a bad parent. It just means you have different resources to work with, so your good parenting will look different from what you see on social media.

Struggles Are Hidden

Perfect social media lives are all carefully planned. They share the good times. They share the perfect pictures and the achievements and the family trips. Any struggles they have won’t show up on social media.

And they do struggle. Every parent struggles. The perfect people you see on social media don’t want to show the difficult parts. They only want to show the good ones, and that’s okay. Just because you can’t see their struggles doesn’t mean they don’t exist.

Validation Seeking

One reason why you might find parents with carefully curated social media profiles is that they’re looking for validation. Parenting is a difficult job and, often, it’s also a thankless one. Your kids grow up and they don’t really think about how much effort you put into raising them. That’s just a part of parenting.

That’s why some people on social media share so many good moments. They share the family trips and the achievements and pictures that make everyone smile. They want a pat on the back for doing a good job.

This isn’t a bad thing. It’s not a reflection on your parenting either. You get to see all of someone else’s good moments while you’re living all your own moments, good and bad. They’re not comparable. You’re doing yourself a disservice by pitting yourself up against good moments only.

No Such Thing as Perfect

There’s no such thing as perfection. Social media lives don’t reflect the totality of someone else’s experience as a parent. So, all those perfect posts you see? They’re small moments in a sea of uncertainty. How good your parenting is has nothing to do with them. So, why should you let perfect social media parents make you feel bad?

Parenting is difficult, no doubt. It has its wonderful moments, of course, but it’s normal to be uncertain about things. It’s normal to be insecure about your parenting abilities, to be nervous about what you’re doing. But if it’s all too much, if you find you need someone to talk to, schedule an appointment with us. Counseling can be more helpful than you think.